The Good, The Bad & The Gray
Welcome to The Good The Bad and The Gray Podcast, a compass in life's labyrinth, shining a light on relationships, wellness, and personal growth. Join me as I share insights and interview diverse guests. Together, we'll discuss highs, lows, and the in-between, offering perspectives on health, career, and more. Tune in for candid conversations that peel back life's layers, revealing the good, the bad, and the gray with hues from light to dark.
The Good, The Bad & The Gray
Ch 2: Ep 1| The Art of Hello and Goodbye Ft. A Renee
When is it time to say hello to new beginnings and when is it time to say goodbye to what no longer serves us? This powerful conversation with special guest Renee explores the delicate balance of transitions in our lives, relationships, and personal growth journeys.
Renee candidly shares her recent post-breakup healing process, revealing how she's learning to embrace peace while working through grief and anger after a painful relationship ending. Her vulnerability around breaking her own rules—like dating a coworker—offers profound lessons about maintaining boundaries and recognizing red flags early on. Meanwhile, I open up about my 18-month healing journey and how I'm finally ready to say hello to love again, but with much greater discernment and self-awareness.
We dive deep into assessing compatibility beyond physical attraction, building trust early in relationships, and the importance of honesty even when the truth is uncomfortable. One of the most powerful metaphors we explore involves seeing obstacles like boulders in a river—sometimes the healthiest approach isn't forcing your way through but allowing yourself to flow around them toward better paths.
Whether you're healing from heartbreak, considering ending a relationship, or preparing to open yourself to love again, this episode offers practical wisdom for navigating life's transitions with grace and authenticity. The conversation reminds us that true growth happens when we have the courage to both embrace new beginnings and release what's holding us back.
Ready to transform how you approach hellos and goodbyes in your life? Listen now, and don't forget to share your questions for our upcoming Q&A episodes through our TikTok or Instagram.
Welcome to the good, the bad and the great podcast, where we shine a light on wellness, personal growth and relationships. Together, we'll discuss highs and lows and the in-betweens, offering different perspectives on health and wellness. Tune in as we peel back the layers of life, revealing the good, the bad and the great podcast. Uh, this podcast, this episode, will be hello and goodbye. Uh, we'll talk a little bit more about why I have a special guest to bring the podcast back today with me a renee.
Speaker 1:A renee I've been known for like seven, seven years yeah something like seven years and man like you've seen like a couple different versions of me and I've seen some versions of you, obviously, yes, um, yeah, we met. What's 2018? 2018 yeah, pre-pandemic man, when you met me, I was skinny. Yeah, you were like 100 pounds, let's not do that you said skinny though, keep going, don't talk about weight.
Speaker 1:Alright, cool, say less. So I met Avery In 2018. That's when I. That's, I think, when I first started my personal training journey. I was still in grad school At the time. And yeah, my personal training journey I was still in grad school at the time and, yeah, I was trying to figure out some stuff. But yeah, we're here today. Thank you for joining us.
Speaker 2:Oh, thank you for having me.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I mean who else? I mean you reached out and said hey yo bro, where's the pot? So, yeah, we're back and I think I'm excited about this episode, because this episode is hello and goodbye and I think that in itself kind of says a lot. Right, we could talk. We're going to talk about some different things that we kind of discuss over text messages and also a few things that piqued our interest in a YouTube video that we saw, which was a great podcast podcast, by the way, one of my favorite podcasts, uh, diary of the ceo, I think. He's, uh he's a good, good host. Um, have some great interviews on there as well. So, yeah, welcome to the pod man, talk to me, what's up thanks for having me catch you up.
Speaker 2:Yes, what's been going on? I was, I was, well, not I was. I had my own podcast.
Speaker 1:Okay.
Speaker 2:So that is no longer, and that was one of the reasons I reached out to you, cause I was like, don't you got a podcast?
Speaker 1:Yeah, everybody got a podcast today.
Speaker 2:Everybody does have a podcast. I got a pair of tennis shoes, a pair of Jordans Everybody does have a podcast. But I remember, I remember when I told you I saw your podcast pop up on my tiktok.
Speaker 1:That's crazy and I was like we tiktok famous I know him.
Speaker 2:Then it's like a couple weeks later I saw you and I was like I'm about to start a podcast and I did, and then that was my hello when I started the podcast and I just said goodbye To the podcast A couple weeks ago.
Speaker 1:Yo, that's crazy. Things come and go, especially podcasts. A lot of podcasts have started A few episodes in and that's it. Yeah, and yeah, it's an interesting thing. I don't know if, obviously, podcasts Is not for everybody. Everybody feels like they have something to say, but they may have like only an episode worth of things to say versus the actual season or correct yeah, and I think you have to know yourself, versus, like uh, just thinking that, oh, I got something to talk about today, I should have something to talk about next year.
Speaker 2:Nah, that's not the case that wasn't my case, though, because I always have something to say, because I'm educated, so I'm always have something to say. Asu period anyway but it wasn't the podcast per se. It was the person that I was doing it with yeah because I was doing it with my significant other and it was understood that if things didn't work like, we were still going to be podcasting. But once everything was revealed, I was like I don't want to do my podcast with this person. So that's why my podcast is no longer.
Speaker 1:I found it very difficult to wear a lot of hats with your person. You know, especially in business it's difficult and that's because we have different things tied to you know, the business aspect but also prior to the business, is usually the personal, the intimate, and I was told by, like, one of my close friends she's a therapist that you know typically once you sleep with a person it's difficult to go to another level with them because you're always going to fall back on that, that moment, and you've already crossed that, that line. Not saying that's the case with you, but she was just saying like yeah, it's, and she was speaking from her own experience.
Speaker 1:She's like yeah this is why you know we can't work out together.
Speaker 2:This is why we can't do all these different type of things, but everybody's different, I feel yeah, yeah, I think everyone is different because it's a lot of people, famous or not, that are business partners and, yeah, real partners, like married relationship or whatever. It's just every. Both parties have to be on the same page. Yeah, so if it's gonna be cheating or infidelity or whatever, then it's not gonna work, which was my case, by the way. So why do I want to continue to do this with you? That may become something lucrative for us, like I don't want to share that with you.
Speaker 1:So bye, that was my goodbye so, so you gotta have a solid foundation. All right, cool, let's get into it. So this episode is titled hello and goodbye. This, this is the hello segment, so I want to pose a question what are you saying hello to today?
Speaker 2:Today I'm saying hello to peace, peace OK To peace and happiness.
Speaker 1:Unpack that. Give me some. Give me some more on that.
Speaker 2:I mean I'm on a healing journey, so I I'm not I'm not gonna say like I'm unhappy. There are Parts of my life that I'm Happy about, right now. And then there's other parts when I'm like I need to work on. So I'm Working towards Like Just being a hundred percent Like where you are In your life right now. That's what.
Speaker 1:I'm trying to be hey look, being a hundred percent, like where?
Speaker 2:you are in your life right now. That's what I'm trying to be, and I know it's gonna take work, like I'm. I'm fine with the work, but I'm I'm saying hello to peace and and happiness, like I mean. That's this amen it's nothing to unpack, it's. That's literally. I just want peace and happiness and I want to be past the situation and that's what I'm trying to. I can't have peace until I'm completely over it. Okay, what are you saying hello to?
Speaker 1:what am I saying hello to, uh first. So love is one, okay, uh, service is another thing. I've been serving, but I'm I just I want to say hello to service every single day because I realized the benefit of just being able to serve and then people being able to kind of like, receive that service and see that there's, you know, love in in in society. But love, I'm saying hello to love because I didn't allow a lot of people to love me in the past friends, relationships.
Speaker 1:I didn't allow it and I think if you truly are to have a friendship, you have to allow people to be your friend yeah you have to allow the like, let yourself lean on them, because that's what they're there for, if they're willing to be that type of in that type of friendship. And I didn't, I didn't allow a lot of that. That's why I wasn't, because I realized, man, why do I, why don't I not have a lot of?
Speaker 1:obviously because I'm weird, I'm a loner, I like personal space at times, depending on the person, always on the go-to I'm always on the go, especially now, for sure, uh, but I do, I don't mind having someone around, like you know, I mean most of the time. But I think the biggest thing is like I didn't allow friends To be friends, and so I'm saying hello to that In terms of love, because I think you should. You have to allow people to love you, not in a way you want them to love you, because everybody loves differently Service, so I'm saying hello to service, so I'm saying hello to service. I'm also saying hello to new beginnings. Man, like I'm saying hello, hello. Um, I think a lot, of, a lot of good things are happening and I'm just gonna be, I'm just gonna let it happen that's a heel black man right, oh my god, you no idea.
Speaker 1:I can't even express the words right now. Like if I could find the words to express, like how, if there was a word past blessed, like a word that would express I would say that Past blessed. Or if there was a word just in terms of saying where I am and how I feel, like joyful is 100%. I've never felt this much joy in my life Never, and obviously I want to share that with someone. So that's why I'm saying hello to love now. I couldn't. I couldn't say that last year it was a lot of nose lash Like yeah, you know, yeah, not none of that. And I think that helped me to grow.
Speaker 1:Like I said, saying no helps you grow yeah uh, because you have to realize the, the patterns, because a lot of time I realize this and I'm getting off topic, we're going to the goodbye, but a lot of the uh no's I I mentioned were no no's that I made mistakes to, yes no's that I said yes to in the past. That were patterns, like certain situations with someone of the opposite sex that I would typically say no to, but I said I typically say yes to, but I said no to because I was like nah, that's not who I want to be today your discernment yeah, so discernment is big this year and I think I've been, I've strengthened in that area times 10, but tests are still coming.
Speaker 1:Tests are still coming. Oh my god, all right, so yeah enough about me.
Speaker 2:That's funny so let's talk about it that's refreshing, though, to see like your journey like and just the conversations that we've had At the gym or whatever Like that's, that's good and that's big Cause. A lot of men Don't give themselves the opportunity to Be at the point that you're in.
Speaker 1:That shows your maturity.
Speaker 2:But you've grown for real, but Some people that have grown and they just don't. They don't give themselves An opportunity to be In the point or the place that you're at now it takes a.
Speaker 2:You don't see it a lot and that's a part of the problem. That is especially on the relationship tip. That's a part of the problem. They are unhealed and they are, they are. They spread their unhealedness towards or throughout the world to other people, and if we had more people like you healing, taking a healing journey for 18 months, the world would be a better place.
Speaker 1:I think we don't have a lot of people going back to teach or coach that healing process.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:And that's part of the issue, and sure that could be a responsibility or a calling for me to kind of like, hey bro, you're here, how can you duplicate? Or calling for me to kind of like, hey bro, you, you're here, how can you duplicate, how can you help?
Speaker 2:you know, and you know, increase that number of men that that aren't here, uh, that are here, but yeah, um I have a question for you how do you since we're on, we're gonna talk about hello first how do you approach women like yes, how do you? What is your hello?
Speaker 1:like, oh, like in the past or now, because this is a different version of me yes, it is a different version of you.
Speaker 2:We've talked about that. Okay, I'll say the current version. We're not gonna talk about the past the current version.
Speaker 1:What is in the hell? What is a hello?
Speaker 2:uh like, how do you say hello? How do you approach women? Do you approach women? I know you on the healing journey.
Speaker 1:So you, I'm like on the tail end of that healing. But if I'm interested in them, how do I approach them?
Speaker 2:yeah oof.
Speaker 1:Um, I have to gauge their intellect in a sense, because I, I do and I find intellect women that are intelligent attractive for sure 100. So I gauge their intellect first and you know, we'll have, if we, if they have great banter we can laugh. If she's not uptight, then yeah, I'll probably gauge intellect and then move from there has a woman ever approached you? Oh my god yo every day.
Speaker 2:What you're talking about?
Speaker 1:every single day no, no, I said that because yo women. So I I'm gonna be honest, I like a, I like bold women. I'm not saying I want women to approach me, but I like bold women. I think that's attractive. But yes, to answer your question, I've had women approach. You've had, like, how do you handle that?
Speaker 2:how do I handle what?
Speaker 1:first and foremost, how do you approach men?
Speaker 2:I don't. I am on a I don't like men journey right now because I'm healing.
Speaker 1:I'm fresh out of relationship. Well, that's so how long are you pretty fresh about, about almost a month what's that healing journey like?
Speaker 2:um, I've been working out a lot. So working out I've been working out a lot because it's helping me, this particular relationship. I don't want to be bashing. I don't want to be a bashing person right now, but I will say I broke some rules.
Speaker 1:You cheated.
Speaker 2:No, I didn't cheat. Okay, say that again. Like I'm saying, like we worked together yeah so I had.
Speaker 2:I had a rule like no co-workers and I broke that rule. Yeah, broke that rule. Um, I did lower a couple standards to be with him, and that's not on the bashing side, but but in hindsight I'm like, was he really my type of man? Maybe the initial attraction it was just I don't know, maybe it was something he said or the words that he was saying to me and it kind of turned me a little bit to where I kind of was like, okay, I'll overlook this to to be with him, but I work out a lot right now, which is nothing wrong with it, I work it out anyway, I work out anyway, but I've been hitting the gym pretty heavy, like I.
Speaker 1:Actually I'm making myself take a rest day on Tuesday so is that like is working out the best way to heal from relationship?
Speaker 2:Well, I was. I was doing counseling too. I've never done counseling, no therapy or nothing like this. This situation really messed me up, like it really did, and people, when I talk to people about it, they don't believe me, because I guess how I'm handling it.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:But I can say, like the last 10 years of my life I've been in 3 serious relationships and I have learned something In each one of them.
Speaker 1:As you should.
Speaker 2:Like, and I. That's why I'm not so Like Bitter or just like Sad or like, of course I was sad, you know what I'm saying, but I'm not finna, just walk around Just like Cause. Of course I would say you know what I'm saying, but I'm not finna, just walk around Just like Cause. Why, like I learned my lesson, I learned what I needed to learn, and I'm, like I said, I'm not trying to Be on the bashing side and like, just say I hate men, cause I Eventually I'll probably Somebody gonna find me, cause I'm not finding nobody.
Speaker 1:They gotta come to me. Yeah, come find you. But nobody.
Speaker 2:They gotta come to me, yeah, come find me. But I'm just, I'm just taking it all in like I'm, it's like I'm getting acquainted with myself again, like I love being in a relationship I do. But when you're not and you realize like the extra things, the little things about yourself that you kind of forgot when you were in a relationship, I'm like, oh yeah, I was like this, like that's literally how I am right now and I'm enjoying it, like, yeah, I'm fine. Oh yeah, I was like this, like that's literally how I am right now and I'm enjoying it, like I'm fine being by myself. Like you know, I do, I work, I go to the gym, I go to the house and I'm fine with it.
Speaker 1:So I've been there on that journey, man I'm almost like I'm like 18 months in Yo, maybe even more that, more a year and a half a long time, bro it is, but I think I needed a full year a full year to really like heal from the relationship and, like you're saying, on that journey you learn a lot of stuff about yourself. I personally like, not only did I learn a lot by myself, I was able to kind of get better at the things that I wasn't so good at, and, yeah, I think that's important. I don't know how long you plan on Taking this journey, because there are some moments where you get Weak, yo, in terms of like wanting to.
Speaker 2:You're going to want somebody.
Speaker 1:You're going to want some attention and I think when you say no the first time, that's when you know you've grown a little bit. So you might have to continue to say no on that journey, because I know I had to say no a lot, not saying no to a person, but there were opportunities where I was like, yeah, no to sending that text, yeah, yeah, yeah, so and I think that helped me grow a lot.
Speaker 1:And now, like I'm past that moment and I'm like yo, I can like say I'm healthy enough to get in something and grow with someone and there's nothing like that feeling. But, like we talked about one time in the gym, it's like when you're so specific about and you know what you want, it's hard to find what you want.
Speaker 2:Yes.
Speaker 1:So that's a double edged sword, because you know, not everyone's going to be perfect, no one's going to be exactly what you want. So you got to be willing to take the good and the good with the bad, obviously, and if not, if not, you're not going to find that person. But go ahead, go ahead.
Speaker 2:Well, no, I understand what you're saying. I'm confident, I'm fine. Like I'm confident how I feel. Like if I really just said how I want to be in life right now, y'all and you would be looking at me like I'm crazy, what do you mean? Unpack that. What you mean? No, because no, I don't want to be that person, but like how I feel like when I say this man like really did me bad, like I want to be to that point where I'm not gonna say I hate men, but like I just want to be to that point where, like I have my male friends that I communicate with, but like I don't think I'm weak. I feel like if somebody Approached me right now, like I'd be, like I might engage in the conversation, but I want to be to the point when I'm like I don't got time, like it's women like that they literally are Happy.
Speaker 1:Get out of my face Like yeah, I've seen, I know a couple women like that and I don't think that's rude, that's just like a boundary for them or something I don't want.
Speaker 2:I don't I don't want to cut my face, being rude or mean or anything, but I'm just like I don't want to be hurt again. That's why I feel how I feel like when you hurt, like that's rough, it is like I'm hurting, but I'm handling it very well, yeah, and the things that I'm doing help me like especially working out, like I'm able to release that in my workouts the anger yeah, the, the anger, the hurt, whatever.
Speaker 2:But I don't know, I, I, I don't, I don't, I don't want to go there, I don't, I don't want to be that person, but I don't know this man, he, he, he did his big one. He definitely did his big one. He scarred me. I'm like bro this is the first time you've been hurt to this extent like with yes when I can, if I just think about maybe like three things that he did, yeah, yeah, yeah he did his big one man.
Speaker 2:Y'all got it. Hey live happily ever. After Y'all got it, I'm good, I'm going to be the fine single auntie forever.
Speaker 1:Single with cats. No cats, no animals. Hey, cats are in now for some reason. I don't like animals, you don't like animals I barely like people or you can't be alone by yourself.
Speaker 2:I barely like people. I don't like animals. I'm not alone. I have friends.
Speaker 1:Okay, that's good.
Speaker 2:I can call you.
Speaker 1:Yeah, hit me up, I'm going to be at your wedding. Oh, please, you got it. You get it, you're going to get a full-blown invitation.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:I'm good though.
Speaker 1:So I've been on the other side Of hurt In terms of hurting someone, and I can, I can honestly admit that that's accountability, obviously, I think.
Speaker 1:I think and the thing is and I don't know where he comes from in terms of inflicting that pain on you A lot of times immaturity it could be past trauma. I'm not making excuses for him because at some point he'll have to hold himself accountable. I think and this is what helped me, because I've been hurt before too I think what helps is forgiveness. You know, I could say that, but it means nothing to someone that doesn't truly understand it.
Speaker 1:Uh, if you forgive yourself for getting into that, holding yourself accountable for getting into that with him, because you already said in the beginning man, I told myself I wasn't gonna date anybody at. At work, I told myself you know what I mean. So you need to forgive her at that point and then work your way back. But if you don't, you're going to always feel that hurt and every time you step into something or you attempt to do it, you're going to withdraw because you're afraid of that hurt again. And unfortunately I'm going to say this I don't know how spiritual you are, but you've heard in the bible that you know we are here to endure, yeah, so I think love is a part of that endurance.
Speaker 1:So in order to like love someone, you really have to be, and typically no one really understands. You have to be insane because at some point you're going to lose them through death, uh, adultery or whatever you know they're. They're going to inflict some type of pain on you in some form. Maybe it's unintentional, but you're going to have to endure that. And love again and that's the whole point of love is insanity. What do they say?
Speaker 1:you keep doing something and expecting a different yeah, that's what love truly is that's why I'm not doing it.
Speaker 2:What you mean, y'all?
Speaker 1:like. But here's, here's the part of it that's a part of our nature as human. We're. We're put here to love, um, not to be alone, isolated, maybe for a small period of time, to work on yourself, but not for and this is and we got to walk into this conversation the dating crisis. Um, that's part of our hello.
Speaker 1:But, anyways, I wanted to say that I think forgiveness is big, but you also have to realize love is an insane cycle because at some point there's hurt on the other side and you have to accept that hurt. But if you accept that hurt in the beginning, when you decide to love you're, then you can. You can transition a little bit better after the fact and I think that's what I've learned after being hurt, but also after inflicted pain, like, oh man, like like I, I need to. If I'm going into something now, I'm going into with that mindset okay, this person will have the ability to hurt me and will I accept that you? You know, regardless of who they are, no matter if they're going to be the best partner ever, they still will have that, that ability to hurt me. So, but I truly want to love. I love love. I love to see people in relationship.
Speaker 2:I love love too, I'm a hopeless romantic.
Speaker 1:I love, love, like I literally love love.
Speaker 2:I love being able to genuinely love somebody and tell them I love them, like I love that. So it kind of makes me mad too. But on the part of what you're saying about forgiveness, like I already beat my ass my own ass for breaking my rules.
Speaker 2:Like I'm like bro, I shouldn't have did it. Like I already done, beat myself up for it On the tip of forgiving him, even though I know he's not going to be apologetic. He's not going to apologize, you know, I know that a part of healing and getting back to whatever happiness or whatever is forgiving him, even if he's not forgiving. You know what I'm saying, I know that. So that's what I'm working through right now and it's a little helpful because, like, I don't see him as much now, so that's very helpful.
Speaker 1:You don't see him as much. No, oh, you don't see him a lot. I don't see him at all. Actually, that's good Out of sight, out of mind. Is that what it is? Amen too, though, like forgiving him, and I'm working on it I am, but I mean, overall I'm fine, but yeah, I just all right, let's not sit there.
Speaker 2:Rules, stick to your rules, your boundaries 100.
Speaker 1:Gotta set those boundaries yeah we talked about some topics I want to jump into. And how do you assess combat beyond attraction, beyond physical attraction?
Speaker 2:It's going to be real helpful, because that's my problem too. When you got to, you can't give too much Like you can't give too much and you can't take people. You can't take what people are giving you like at face value, like you have to. It takes time and I think that was a part of my issue too, like Jumping, moving too fast.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Like you might look good and what you said today Might sound good, but Maybe a conversation that we had tomorrow or the next day. I might be a little bit like Hold on. Yeah, I I might be a little bit like hold on, I don't agree with that, and that's like a part of my problems too. So I think you, you can't be afraid to Give a little space.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:And Maybe miss a couple days talking or maybe a little check in. But Don't get attached too fast Because you're going to confuse that. You're going to confuse the two with what you say attraction and what compatibility and compatibility like you can make you gonna. You can psych yourself up to think that this is the person that you want to be with, just because y'all talking all the time about whatever yeah and you can't. You can't do that.
Speaker 1:You gotta give a little space how you feel about it um, so let me, let me, let me, uh, pose a question again. Well, the topic is basically assessing compatibility beyond attraction. So, personally, for me, I think that. So one of my biggest I'm going to say biggest fears, but one of my fears now is like I've been so removed from a lot of that type of intimacy with the opposite sex. Yeah, that, how do I know if it's like compatibility and not just and just attraction, not and not compatibility? You know, because I'm like, oh man, like she's everything right right, like let's go right.
Speaker 1:So, um, I think for me, what I'm working on is, like you kind of said, taking a step back, like going in, but not like full, kind of like seeing things for what they are. And this is something that I learned and I was it's crazy, because a lot of times I've been learning a lot of things without having a direct conversation about the subject. And a lady was telling me. She was like, and we weren't even talking about, so she, we were talking about like I was telling her like yeah, I got these decisions, I need to know if I'm gonna go here, do this. So we were talking about like I was telling her like yeah, I got these decisions, I need to know if I'm gonna go here Do this, If I'm gonna make this decision To do that. I was just speaking out loud, she was just listening and she was like Hold on. She was like Be careful, because the first one that comes Is gonna be exactly what you want them to be and not what you need them to be.
Speaker 2:Exactly.
Speaker 1:And I was like what I said what she's like, bro she gave.
Speaker 1:She's like you're single, you're attractive, you're intelligent. I mean I can go down the list. A woman's going to see that. She said that I'm not trying to. You know, big up myself. Hey, look, whatever. She said that and I was like, okay. She was like, yeah, a woman's going to try to exploit that Because she's gonna see that she could be exactly what she needs To be for you and you're gonna think that she's the best thing ever. When she's not, she said pass up on her and that next one that comes Is gonna be exactly what you need.
Speaker 2:And then that, to your point, you gotta be careful, cause those, what you like in a woman, what you like in a man, questions. Is gonna be a way for them to manipulate. That's how they feel to be like. Oh oh, he said he like women.
Speaker 1:That's healthy oh, I'm gonna be a gym, yeah, like, yeah, I'll be very careful with those yes, okay, I haven't had nobody ask me that question and I haven't asked because so you say don't, don't give them my likes and dislikes.
Speaker 2:Not too much. Keep it real basic, Because if you really tell her what you like in a woman, she's going to try to be that even if she's not.
Speaker 1:Here's the thing about me now, now that I've had a lot of time to kind of observe women, is I know I can see them, for them, so I can see.
Speaker 1:I don't know if this person is truly being themselves or they're putting on right yeah um, now some people have the effect on other people to want them to change and form into something better or be seen in a different light, because they see that this person is more clean cut. They are driven ambitious. Now they feel like, okay, I gotta be this other person, when on the other side of that I was like sleeping with all these guys and I was out here in the streets. But no, this guy looks at me in a different light. I need to be what he know. I've learned that it's okay if that person is truly trying to change. But I don't think if, if I were somebody giving me advice, I would get in a relationship with that person that just wants to be who they think I want, because that's dangerous.
Speaker 2:Yes.
Speaker 1:Very dangerous it is, and I realized I've done that in the past. You know what I mean. I would meet a girl and she completely who she wasn't like, completely different person than she was before. I'm like bro, like be yourself, just be yourself.
Speaker 2:But I've already.
Speaker 1:I've already made up my mind that I know she is, but I'm okay, I'm gonna go, I'll go down this road, you know, completely erase the boundary, but anyways, yeah. So I think that answers that. Let's move to the next one.
Speaker 2:Building trust early on, don't ignore the signs. That was a part of my problem too. I caught him and I relate a lot of this to me, which helps me to grow. But I caught him in a lie early on and the response like every time I caught him in something, it was a simple lie. It was about a phone call. Somebody called him and it was a female and I know the female very well and I said so-and-so called you. Oh, that's not the so-and-so that we know, that's another so-and-so.
Speaker 2:But I knew the number because I used to talk to this person all the time. So like I called him out on it and he was like, well, I just didn't want you to feel no type of way. I'm like you could have answered the phone or just told the truth, like, and it was like, well, if you don't want to talk to me anymore, then I understood like just that. So it's like man sometimes just tell the truth, like you lying about small stuff, and then just from that alone should have been like one of the red flags, Like he going to lie about this.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Then ain't no telling what else he'll lie about.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:What you think about In your unhealed life.
Speaker 1:Un unhealed life because you healed. Now right, so I can talk, you heal now um, well, so in the past I I've been there. I I know, you know the small lies lead up to big lies. Um, I've also been on the other side of lies, from even friendships and and I realized that, you know, typically a person will lie for a few different reasons. One is because they're serving something else and they don't want to give up their loyalty to serving that.
Speaker 1:It could be money if they're serving, if their main motivation is money, they will lie to you to make sure they stay loyal to that money yeah and I've seen, I've seen somebody do that and I really had to cut them off because, like bro, like I see what your loyalty lies, your loyalty lie, and I'm like, okay, I gotta, gotta get out of that. But I've been on the other side of lying and for me, at the time when I was like unhealed, I was I would lie because I was afraid of the person leaving, I was like man, if I, like you know, if I, if I tell the truth, they gonna leave, when that's not being a man, that's immature, um, so many different things and so many levels to that. And I realized, like, just looking back on it, like man, if I was just told the truth, they probably would have stayed and we probably could have got a little bit further, right yeah um.
Speaker 1:so yes, I think I've seen both sides of it and typically it's because that person that's lying is serving something else and they're loyal to something else. And if you know what that is, it's not your, it's not your job to kind of challenge it. And this is what I realized in this past. So I had a guy I was real cool with and out of nowhere he would just start lying. I'm like, why is he lying? I'm like, okay, I'm going to stay here and I'm trying to figure out why he was lying. And I figured out why and I was like, okay, he's going to continue to lie to me about this particular thing. So I got to remove myself to help him heal, because I'm the reason he's lying at this point, because he's like you know, I got to lie to this guy because this guy's going to see me in a different light. I'm like, bro, I accept you for who you are. I'm not going to judge you.
Speaker 1:So, anyways, fast forward. I stopped being friends with him because that's what he would do, and I stopped trying to understand it and I just kind of let him be. And he kind of came back around like, bro, I wasn't honest with you. This is where I was, so sometimes you got to give those people space and figure out who they're really loyal to or who they really want to serve. They want to serve this money, or they want to serve this friendship, and and I kind of like. Sometimes you just got to give people space to figure that out. Remove yourself quick, though, or you will continue to get hurt yes, remove yourself quick quickly, expeditiously quick, fast and in a hurry yeah so that.
Speaker 2:but that's a lesson though, though for me personally, like when you clock the T call it out. Call it out, don't just let it keep riding. And it was always like if you don't want to talk to me anymore, then I understand. So to your point of you know you don't want to lose them.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:That's why you told the lie.
Speaker 1:But just tell the truth, the truth going to get you way farther than the lie 100%. It is so true that the truth will set you free.
Speaker 2:It will Just be honest Because it's going to make you feel lighter. Yes.
Speaker 1:And it's also going to put everything out front. And this is one of the most important things I've learned and I wish I would have knew back then is if you tell the truth a lot earlier, then it gives them more time to work through it. But if you hold that, that, that lie, to the very end, they'll be hurt way more because so much stuff is going to transpire in that in that time frame. So go ahead and get ahead of it. Hey, right now, look, this is what happened. But if you wait a year down the road and they find out, oh, it's worse, just go ahead and get ahead of it.
Speaker 2:Tell the truth up front and not later and then again to your point that that first lie once. You lie one time.
Speaker 1:You gotta lie and keep lying because you gotta tell a lot of cover that one and you gotta tell another lot of cover that one and that one like you, just like.
Speaker 2:You're just a liar you can't lie to what women are detectives, bro, they are good whether they good detect, whether they detected in the beginning, the middle of the end, they gonna find everything out eventually, especially if you're not.
Speaker 1:If you're like an intelligent guy and they're attracted to you because you're intelligent, they're probably intelligent as well, where they're gonna pick up some of that stuff up from you yeah and it kind of be able to assess the situation. But yeah, all right, moving on, what's the next point? So let's get into the goodbye first. Let's start off this segment by saying what are you saying goodbye to?
Speaker 2:Dang, I don't want to go first, because you know what I'm saying goodbye to you. Know what I'm saying goodbye to All. Right Dang, I'll go first, okay, I mean.
Speaker 1:Okay, go ahead, you got it.
Speaker 2:Clearly what I'm saying goodbye to. I'm saying goodbye to. I'll say I'm saying goodbye to, like the, I don't. I'm not bitter, but whatever is right before bitter. That's where I'm at and I don't want to be that, I just want to be like it is what it is yeah like. So I'm saying goodbye to this hurt that I, that I have you know, what I'm saying. I genuinely want peace, and I'm feeling it more and more every day.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:But I genuinely just want peace in my life. So I'm saying goodbye to this, to this hurt and the anger that pops up here and there. That's what I'm saying goodbye to. Okay, but again, we know what kind of pathway I'm on right now, so your answer is gonna be completely different from mine yeah, for sure.
Speaker 1:What are we talking about today? We're not talking about last year. We're talking about what are you saying? Goodbye or hello?
Speaker 1:to today uh, man, what am I saying goodbye to today? I would have to say Tuscaloosa for sure. Uh, no, no, no, no, I got. There's a lot of, there's a lot of work to be done here, so I put some things in place to make sure that I that process is you know the things that I I think I want to contribute to this area is what still happened. Uh, I'm saying goodbye to man. I've already said goodbye. I said a lot of goodbyes a long time ago, so, oh, it's a true hill man. I'm trying to figure out what I'm saying goodbye to, because I've been saying hello to a lot of things.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that's the only thing I can say goodbye to. Uh, I've been saying hello to a lot of things.
Speaker 1:Tuscaloosa. Yeah, that's the only thing I can say. Goodbye to Tuscaloosa. I'm saying goodbye to. I think that's it. Honestly, oof, I would say, okay. One thing I can say I'm saying goodbye to and this is a work in progress here is to not fully walking in the light. Not fully walking in the light Like I realized. Okay, I'm saying goodbye to not using my superpowers. I didn't realize I had. I realized I had them, but I didn't know how to use them, like I didn't know how to speak. I really use my words to speak life Really use my smile to affect someone, really use my eyes to see, affect someone you really use to my eyes to see, but also for them to see me for truly, for who I am, because I had a lot of dark clouds over there. So I'm really saying goodbye to, you know, not like walking with my light, like I'm. I have it, so I'm gonna walk with it and I'm hoping that it could, you know, impact some people in in positive ways.
Speaker 2:So I don't think I've ever seen you have a bad day like if you have, like you, masked it very well, yeah you. You usually most of the time I see you at the gym, so I can use that as an example. But if you're not just pushing somebody to work a little harder in their their exercise, like you, real happy you be singing out loud.
Speaker 1:Singing. Oh yeah, I'll be in full concert, don't stop clapping, I'll be like Yo.
Speaker 2:I hear you over my music.
Speaker 1:I'll be in full. This is the new version. The old version Wasn't doing that.
Speaker 2:You was locked in. I mean you be locked in now, but like you're a little bit more Like Approachable.
Speaker 1:You're not as like yes, you're very much more approachable.
Speaker 2:Or I've heard like I mean, I never felt no type of way about approaching you, but other people might have yeah I've heard people describe it as, like you feel more like family like yeah I bring the family energy.
Speaker 1:But I think that's what I want to, you know, project like there is love here unconditionally, there's kindness here, but there's a line, yeah, calm, but there's a line like don't get it twisted. I'm calm, but there's a line don't get it twisted. Um, and I think we don't have a lot of people in the world that's like that. So gotta lead by example, I gotta be the change. So I'm literally walking into that change and every single day my mind is like okay, how can I be what I need? Like I was telling um one of the pastors that I, we kind of talk almost every single day. He'll call me at 10 o'clock while he's at work and we, I'll start talking. He'll get some ideas about, uh, you know, a sermon or something he's going to preach on Sunday and say, oh, just, man, man, justin, we're talking about this. It's funny, man, because we've been talking about some good stuff.
Speaker 1:But, um, I was telling him I was like man, like I really truly feel like I'm the man that I needed growing up as a kid and I was like I've I never thought I would get there like, and I feel like me. That's, that's one of the biggest accomplishment outside of my PhD, outside of know whatever amount of money that is being thrown at me, like I'm the guy that I needed growing up and I think I have a responsibility now to be that man for a lot of young men. So, um, that's another thing that that's on my docket. This this year is to be that light for young men because, let's be honest, based off that podcast we talked about, men are in a different place and there's no leadership among us to speak about or even practice healthy emotions or emotional intelligence that women want yeah um, when there's a trade-off, we'll have to get into that.
Speaker 1:But yeah, so I. So I think I'm saying goodbye to that. That's the answer to your question. Let's move to the next. Close it. I got to get long-winded man. Yes, you do.
Speaker 2:That's your superpower. So, on the goodbye side, what are some signs that it's time to end things? Ooh.
Speaker 1:Yo, you want me to start, start, you want to start. You got it. Take away even friendship. So I've realized this, and this is recently for me.
Speaker 1:Typically, when your heart and mind are in line, that's 100% time to move on. I think, though, sometimes they're not aligned. Um, when you feel and this is just me now when I feel like I'm in an ambivalent place with someone, it's time to move on, because I'm in the middle, I'm not sure about you and I'm not uncertain about you, so it's time to move on, it's time to make some space, or it's time to move on. So I think, for anyone, typically, your heart knows If you truly listen to your heart, your brain probably gonna put all these other equations in the front of it be like you know where. If he does this, well, he's going to church and you know he's a good guy. I gotta stick with.
Speaker 1:He could be the worst thing ever going to church, but your brain said it. But your heart knows, your heart knows yo like. So, if you're in a, in a place like that, and your heart knows, your heart knows yo Like. So, if you're in a, in a place like that, and your heart is saying like, it's time to like move on. Typically, you and that person Are not in line Because I'm telling you and this is just from experience Like I've had Two occasions last year when it was as loud it could have been, god could have been saying, justin, it's time, it's time and it's time to let this person go. Literally one of my closest people, my boys, he was like they can't go with you on this journey.
Speaker 2:You have to let them go.
Speaker 1:And I'm like what? I couldn't sleep that night, the night before. And let me tell you how I knew and this is just some supernatural stuff, maybe I don't know they literally prompted a text message and my brain was already there and I was like this is the sign I've made the decision last night. And maybe God is saying look, I'm going to help you out by showing you that this is this is what you should do and I was like you know what?
Speaker 1:hey, man, move on, uh. But yeah, I think, to answer your question, I think if you're in the middle about someone, especially if your heart is just not like there, it's probably time to move on and it could be time to take a break. But just move out of the space with them so you can truly listen to what you need, because if you can't hear what you need and you're with that person, probably the wrong person.
Speaker 2:I agree, like if things Feel different, then they probably are, and maybe not when you can see it, but you can feel it. So if If it seems like it's Something else, then it probably is, and that's a part of my, of what I've learned. Like you, you not crazy, you, you probably right and sometimes, like you said, your brain and your and your heart, like they be clashing.
Speaker 1:Yeah, they clash, they clash For sure.
Speaker 2:Then for the woman, you gotta add the women's intuition Into that thing. Men have intuition too, but thing.
Speaker 1:So men have to wish intuition too. But we don't have to talk about that.
Speaker 2:I apologize, yeah don't try to discount our power. So sorry, but when you thinking about all these different things, it's like hold on. So when I, for me when it starts to feel like the everyday things are not happening anymore yeah then it's something else going on and it's time to break away and it's hard to especially.
Speaker 2:Well, you said on the friendship tip, which that's that's. That's very relevant too, but it can be hard. I'm not gonna say it's hard, but it can be hard To end things and that's A lot of times. That's why people don't, because it's hard but it's necessary.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:And it can Save you from a lot of other things too. That's true. That's true If you just End it. Now, that's a good one Healing and allowing yourself to grieve, because you have to grieve even if they're not dead yeah, for sure no, what I told you.
Speaker 2:I was in counseling briefly and she was like you have to grieve, even though they, they didn't pass away and that's very weird and some people it's not hard for when I I tell you my TikTok been TikToking because they're supposed to be like y'all be sad about y'all. Y'all not with a person anymore. Man, I be acting like they did and move on. But it's kind of weird because it's not dead. So for me that's very strange for me, but go ahead.
Speaker 1:That is very strange. I think you have to work on grieving them, right.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:So on my phone I've had this entire year. Last year I had this wallpaper that says Accept, grieve, surrender. Right Now I can tie that into actual scripture James 4, verse 9. Get into that another day, but it's deep. I found this. This spoke to me before I even found a scripture to relate it to. That. That blew my mind, but whatever, um, so last year on my journey, every single day, every day, I practiced grieving. So I would feel sad, I would allow myself to feel sad About separation with someone. I would feel the happy moments, I would get angry. This is all. I would do this every single morning. So I would literally work at grief Like it was a muscle and at the very end of it I would surrender to my current situation, like, okay, they're not here, right now, I'm gonna surrender to this moment.
Speaker 1:I'm gonna be here in this moment, right here, and whatever is speaking to me, that's what I'm, that's what I am and that's who I am in this moment, every, I mean every single day. You know what. You know what happened. I got very good at grieving people.
Speaker 1:Oh, very good at it like I need right write that down now I'm telling you now, this is this, this is my secret weapon, but I'm not saying like I don't care about them. This goes back to our initial point, and my initial point in the beginning is I understood that there's pain with the love that comes with this person yeah I've accepted that by entering in this thing with you, even if it's a friendship, like okay, cool, you're cool, you're going to hurt me at some point.
Speaker 1:I accept that. I know I'm going to have to grieve that, but right now I'm going to show you some unconditional love. You're going to lie. If you lie to me, cool, I'm going to set that boundaries, draw that line. I'm going to still love you but I'm going to separate myself from you because I don't want that in my life. And if you circle back and there comes a time where we, we, we come back around and I kind of relate this to an analogy I was talking to a man, talk to a pastor.
Speaker 1:Again, we're talking about water, right, so you know there's and this is in terms of your journey. Think about this in terms of your journey. Water is always flowing toward whatever the current is going, right. So say, for instance, you got a river. Say you throw a big boulder into that river. In terms of your journey, water is always flowing toward whatever the current is going, right. So say, for instance, you got a river. Say, for this, you throw a big boulder into that river. What happens? The boulder sits up at the top of the river, the water part ways to find the easiest flow path. Right, that's what you have to do, because at some point, that person is going to be a boulder in your journey and instead of you trying to force your way through it, you just have to flow around it. Maybe there's a point on the other end of that, that, that uh stream where you guys come back again. Maybe not. Maybe the boulder is so big that it actually splits the river yes that's.
Speaker 1:But as long as you're trying to force your way towards and through that that boulder, you're stuck, You're not going anywhere. Yeah, so allow yourself to flow around and separate. I call it just separate, not just separating from the person, but allow your your energy to just flow around it and it'll find a better path. I think I answered your question. What was that question? What find a better path? I think I answered your question.
Speaker 2:What was that question? What was? Oh, healing, yes, healing, healing and allowing yourself to grieve.
Speaker 1:So yes, just to assert. Just to wrap it up, I think it's important to practice grief every like.
Speaker 1:Do it every day, you're gonna get really good at I don't want to be sad, though you gotta you gotta sit in it because, think about it, if you sit in it, if you sit in it multiple times, it won't just, it won't just be you hitting you at random times. It's going to happen because it's like a roller coaster. But if you decide to sit in there with it, okay, let me think about these, these moments and allow yourself to process it. I guarantee you you won't be thinking. It won't just hit you at nowhere and you just start crying because you missed that person.
Speaker 2:It may, may or may not miss who I'm missing, it's all good, all right you can make me be angry instead of grieving next question um learning, pet learning from the past while embracing new opportunities. So that's, that's a little. That's a little relevant to the boulder in the road like yeah, if the boat in the road, but in the in the water so you want me to go on this one, you going learning from the past. Well, I'm not embracing new opportunities, so I'm not gonna be a good example for this I am learning from the past, and that's it.
Speaker 2:We're not embracing nothing over here, I'm good okay.
Speaker 1:So I think learning from the past, embracing new opportunities uh, learning yourself more than you're learning a situation. Learning your past self versus learning a situation that happened is more important, because once you walk into that new opportunity, you know if it's for you and you'll probably know what direction is going if you know yourself yeah um.
Speaker 1:So I think for me, like a lot of past situations I probably wouldn't walk into, but I'm I'm grateful of those situations because they taught me, like okay, justin, not that route, okay Justin, not this. Like I'm okay with making, making mistakes, and I also know that the L's, or the losses you take in certain moments, sure they're wins for other people, but down the road they may be a lesson for that same person that won. They may look back on it and be like man, like yo, like I wasn't a good person back then and I took advantage of this person because I thought they were kind, let me circle back, you know. And if they don't circle back, it's cool. No expectations here. But yeah, I think it's important to learn yourself from the past and uh, and so you will know how situations are when you're in a current situation, what way they would go.
Speaker 2:I think that everything that we go through is a lesson, so, and it it can be the good things or the bad things. Like I think, anything that we go through, it's going to be a learning. I'm learning here. I feel like this is a therapy hey look, so if we want to be for real, dr gray but, I feel like you know you're gonna have something you know to learn from pretty much anything that you encounter.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I agree, and it's going to be. You can learn. You know whether you can do it again or learn to, not so I can receive that, but embracing things, we embracing gains and abs right now, that's what we're embracing?
Speaker 1:Oh for sure, for sure, the physical gains. Yes, that's what we're embracing. Oh for sure, for sure, the physical gains. All right, understood. Wait, are we skipping the power of hello again, or understanding the importance of pain plus the growth of a breakup?
Speaker 2:the power of hello again. I mean, that's, that's the journey you're on now, like, yeah, you have said hello, you say yeah. You're healed and you're ready to say hello again.
Speaker 1:Yeah, 100%. Oh man, this is going to be good. I'm excited. Look, I've never been excited to and this is another thing, and I want to encourage you to do this.
Speaker 1:So Wise Men always said that when there's a time of war, prepare for peace. Vice versa. So, when you're in a place of isolation, prepare. If you truly want to be with someone, prepare yourself to be in a relationship. It's very difficult now.
Speaker 1:I think last year I was preparing like, okay, how do? Obviously getting myself together, but how do I want to? You know, uh, when I'm with my person, what do I want to do? Like, how do I, how do I want to interact with them? What do I want to send in terms of love? And you know all these different type of things I'm preparing in my brain. So now I'm like I'm super excited because I feel like I'm well equipped for the journey. If this is with the right person, obviously, um.
Speaker 1:But I think hello again for me is being vulnerable and open to you know, unfortunately hurt. Hello again is is like, okay, who's gonna hurt me now? Not now in the, maybe down the road, because something happens, maybe they unfortunately have a loss, they pass away, but that's hurt. So I think to me, hello again is saying hello to love, but also hurt again. And I'm okay with that because I'm willing to love again and I know hurt is going to come with it. So I'm willing to have new people in my life. I'm willing to have new, you know people in my life. Hello again for me is definitely opening up to you know that ability and now you may not understand that the reason I keep saying hurt is coming with this love.
Speaker 2:No, I know what you're saying. That is why I am as unrealistic as it sounds. It's why I'm like bro. I'm good on love, because I know hurt is going to come with it. It can be. It can be the smallest thing.
Speaker 1:I know that hurt is going to come and I don't I'm not saying you should be looking like once you get this person, you should be looking for the hurt that they're going to cause you. I'm saying you need to understand that that is a process in love yeah like you're gonna have to experience hurt in some form. So yeah, hello again hello again for justin. Oh, absolutely, not for everything um, all right, so let's take one topic from the uh, the youtube podcast that we we saw women mature faster than men, that's not, that's a given.
Speaker 1:That's three minutes, of course, but that means nothing. That's me. That means nothing. That means nothing. Too many options due to technology.
Speaker 2:So that's like relating to Online dating.
Speaker 1:Is that?
Speaker 2:something that you.
Speaker 1:I don't. As a man, I don't want to do online dating Because I'm so much of an in person person. But it's difficult to meet people If you don't do Online dating. So I haven't Made that step yet it's not Really.
Speaker 2:It's not difficult. It's not difficult To meet people If you're not online, okay, but but I haven't Online dated In a very long time. It's not something that I'm like Trying to do either, okay, it's not something that. I'm trying to do either. Okay, by the way, but it's not, and it might just be where you are Like you need to change your scenery.
Speaker 1:I just did. I'm in a whole different state now.
Speaker 2:Exactly so. This state has more people. This is a conversation that we've had.
Speaker 1:Yes, this state has more people, so online data would actually be more beneficial to me in this state, based off of the area that you're in, so then it might work In your favor. Yeah.
Speaker 2:But I feel like the what you're doing there you might not even need that. You still go into the gym Like you might See somebody at the gym.
Speaker 1:Yeah, but the gym Only like Lustful eyes.
Speaker 2:They just wanna smash Some of the folks at the gym Only be going to the gym To.
Speaker 1:I want to smash Some of the folks at the gym only be going to the gym. To you right to find somebody. To find somebody.
Speaker 2:They ain't even working out for real.
Speaker 1:I ain't mad at that. Maybe I need to go to more coffee shops. I'm doing a coffee shop tour this summer too in the new state. Go to, like, a bunch of different coffee shops, not to find someone but just to kind of do coffee reviews. I'm interested in that. Interesting do coffee reviews. I'm interested in that.
Speaker 2:Interesting, so you're going to be doing different things.
Speaker 1:Yeah, coffee reviews. It's going to be a lot.
Speaker 2:Hey, you know what I'm cutting you off? I mean to you coming, do they?
Speaker 1:have a, we'll fly you in. We'll fly you in for episode, for sure, for sure.
Speaker 2:Do they have a running club?
Speaker 1:Absolutely Plenty of them. You should, you. Is that where you? That's where you find singles.
Speaker 2:That's what hey, that's what I saw on TikTok. They was like Y'all got a running club, y'all need to join a running club, cause the men, the women, you know they gonna be On their type of time, they gonna be on the workout.
Speaker 1:They wanna work out.
Speaker 2:Yeah, some people say don't like, people like if you work out.
Speaker 1:They don't want their partner to work out too I mean we need to work out, not together, but like yeah, yeah, okay and yeah, we'll be doing that. Um, I think that's it for our pod. It's that second segment, which is goodbye. Uh, is there anything else you want to say to our listeners about hello and goodbye?
Speaker 2:No, just trust your instincts, trust yourself, believe. Believe what you feel, but also believe what you see.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:And take people for face value what they give you. Don't overlook that great.
Speaker 1:Um, what I would say is, in terms of hello and goodbye, be open. Uh, in this chapter I don't. I don't like to refer to these as seasons, just because I think seasons are, you know, cyclical, like they're going, and they're always the same season at some point. I think chapters are ongoing, so you have a new chapter and you're always moving forward, never backwards. So just be open to things and when it's time to walk away, let it go, walk away. I don't know how I feel about the saying if it's meant to walk away, let it go Walk away. I don't know how.
Speaker 2:I feel about the saying if it's meant it'll come back, maybe, maybe not, I don't know. No, it won't, and don't open yourself up to let it come back.
Speaker 1:Yeah. So just for hello and goodbye, just be open to the new things and for things that you feel like your heart Is not, is no longer speaking to, it's okay to move on from it.
Speaker 2:Yeah, let it go.
Speaker 1:So Alright, thank you guys. Oh, share your social media.
Speaker 2:My social media Um, my TikTok is Arenayash92. My Instagram is I sing On the piano, you sing on the piano, and that's my snap as well. I sing on the piano, you sing on the piano, and that's my snap as well. I sing on the piano. And my Facebook? We not gonna Cause it got my real name on there, that's a lot of information.
Speaker 1:You trying to get people To stalk you, huh.
Speaker 2:No, that's why I didn't Give my Facebook Chill out.
Speaker 1:Alright. Thank you guys for listening. On the next coming episodes, we're trying to get some q a, so feel free to send some questions in our inbox, in tiktok or uh instagram. And until next time we are out thanks for having me bye.
